I had a pretty vivid dream the other night. In it I had a stroke and it wiped out my memory and I went back in time and was trying to live that life because it was all I could remember. So many things had changed. There were/are new people in my life now vs. back then and it was painful to see certain people hurt because I didn't remember them. But yet, the people in my memory were not the same as they had aged.
Painful because I almost felt like I knew no one but at the same time I felt more at peace with my life in that past than in the "present". It's so hard to explain. Anyway, it was only a weird dream.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Epic Fail
Okay so this may never be a daily blog. I just get too tired everyday to sit at the computer to try to write a creative blog.
I don't remember if I blogged it but my meds were reduced to 150mg. Not too sure that was a good move, but I am having a pretty normal sleep cycle. So that is good. But I am more emotional and can break down from left field... not knowing why.
Looking at alot of changes this year. My son is joining the USAF. My one daughter is graduating high school. The third kid will be a teenager this year. I will be a 40 year old parent of three teenagers. Wow! LOL!
As I was sitting at my daughter's class day today I thought back on my own class day. I was one of those kids who was undecided. As I sat there today, 20 some odd years later, I was still that same kid. I have no idea what I want to do with my life. Sure, yeah, it's passing me by. I am a CNA and a dang good one. But I can't help but wonder... is this it? Is this my life? Is this all I will ever do/be?
I don't remember if I blogged it but my meds were reduced to 150mg. Not too sure that was a good move, but I am having a pretty normal sleep cycle. So that is good. But I am more emotional and can break down from left field... not knowing why.
Looking at alot of changes this year. My son is joining the USAF. My one daughter is graduating high school. The third kid will be a teenager this year. I will be a 40 year old parent of three teenagers. Wow! LOL!
As I was sitting at my daughter's class day today I thought back on my own class day. I was one of those kids who was undecided. As I sat there today, 20 some odd years later, I was still that same kid. I have no idea what I want to do with my life. Sure, yeah, it's passing me by. I am a CNA and a dang good one. But I can't help but wonder... is this it? Is this my life? Is this all I will ever do/be?
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